Book Information

Book ID Asin: 0787975699
Book Title: How Long Does It Hurt?: A Guide to Recovering from Incest and Sexual Abuse for Teenagers, Their Friends, and Their Families
Book Author: Cynthia L. Mather,Kristina E. Debye,Judy Wood,Eliana Gil
Book Format and Price:
Book Format Name: Kindle
Book Format Price: $13.01
Book Format Name: Paperback
Book Format Price: $19.95
Book Price: $19.95
Book Category: Books, Health, Fitness & Dieting, Psychology & Counseling and unknown
Book Rating: 64 ratings

Book Product Detail

• Best Sellers Rank: #271,732 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #413 in Abuse Self-Help
  • #504 in Social Work (Books)
  • #699 in Popular Psychology Pathologies

• Customer Reviews:
  4.6 out of 5 stars 64 ratings

Book Review

Name: Amy Kline-Rodriguez
Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Pretty Good
Date: Reviewed in the United States on February 20, 2014
Review: I bought this book for a struggling teen and decided to read it before sharing.

The description of what constitutes sexual abuse is excellent. In fact, I was surprised to learn that some of the things that I had encountered as a kid were included as abuse. I knew these things, like sexual or body references, made me cringe but I never would have called them abuse. It was actually very validating to realize that my feelings were correct. That is one of the best things about this book--it clears away any denial, minimization, and doubt about abuse experiences. So much information on sexual abuse only contains the most extreme violent acts, which undermines the more ambiguous experiences people have. Sexual abuse can be so subtle that it makes a victim think they are crazy for feeling violated. This book makes it very clear that your personal instincts, gut feelings, are the indicator that matters most.

There are two things that I wasn't thrilled about:

First, since most children are abused by a person they are familiar with, I think that the internet dangers should have been moved to the end of the book. It was distracting to skim through that section, particularly after the definition of incest. Most kids know the perpetrators of abuse. It only makes sense to start there.

Second, I respect the fact that women do molest kids. But it can't be denied that the vast majority of perps are men. The back-and-forth use of men/women, he/she, became tedious and distracting. I understand the author doesn't want to leave out victims of women molesters. But it was actually offensive to me that the female pronouns were distributed equally. Maybe that is just my own issue.

Name: Carleenie
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: EXTREMELY HELPFUL
Date: Reviewed in the United States on February 18, 2017
Review: Needed this to deal with most intimate crisis in family. It answers ALL questions and you can learn as a survivor OR a family member of the survivor how to deal with such tragedy. I would love if EVERY therapist had this in their arsenal. And EVERY survivor. LIFE CAN GO ON. Yes, things will change BUT your life will move forward if you work at it. FAITH is everything (to me). It should be for ALL. FAITH in JESUS will lessen the pain and help move you forward and still achieve the dreams you had/have for yourself. This book is wonderful.

Name: karen
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: I've been reading the book and found it to be ...
Date: Reviewed in the United States on November 6, 2016
Review: I've been reading the book and found it to be very informative, answers questions I wondered about, gets real deep and u realize u weren't and aren't alone...I only wish my daughter would read it again.....She rushed thru it but felt I forced her to read it,,,I kinda did..She has been in therapy but chose to put it behind her and won't talk about it..One day she will and I think when she's ready she will pick up this book and start the healing process....Outstanding work! Thank u Cynthia for sharing ur experiences and helping the survivers of sexual abuse heal.

Name: Christy Anway
Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Good choice for young readers
Date: Reviewed in the United States on April 25, 2011
Review: I really liked this book, but I had to give it only three stars because of the language in it. A lot of the verbiage seemed almost patronizing, but I think for a younger audience, this would be perfect. Some of the points in the book were very good, and some of the parts (especially in chapters 10 and 11) really felt like was talking to me directly.

What I liked most about this book, however, was that it includes boys a lot throughout the book. I think this is an important aspect that not a lot of books touch on. I think with the statistics being so hard to come by for boys, there is a lot more difficulty for boys to tell and feel like they are not the only ones out there that this might be happening to. For that alone this book should get five stars. I would highly recommend this book to any adolescent, especially males!

Name: Vicki Reiner
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Good info
Date: Reviewed in the United States on April 28, 2015
Review: I find this book helpful in my prep for encouraging my clients. Seems to cover all aspects a person needs to consider. The authors are careful to keep language in line with subject. I realize how challenging it must be to avoid negative language and cursing in abuse testimonials. The authors allow for that yet keep it in the context of the person being interviewed. I will use this book for reference from now on and will recommend it for those who need to understand and help themselves or someone they care about.

Name: Mstorm
Rating: 4.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Addresses many of the tough questions...
Date: Reviewed in the United States on November 13, 2014
Review: I read sections of this book aloud in my support group. The author does a great job of sharing the victims perspective, raising awareness and helping the victim feel 'normal' and safe to make decisions for their growth moving forward. Very good for anyone that has been a victim of sexual abuse learn to understand the process they might go through and to regain their sense of worth.

Name: Ty k
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Great to use for kids in therapy
Date: Reviewed in the United States on February 3, 2014
Review: A therapist I know recommended this and I read the first couple of chapters but never got a chance to finish it. I recently did the book with a 10 year old client, and I loved it. It has easy to understand language with great examples and covers a lot.

Name: AJewell
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: over and over again because it's one of the best I've found to give to teens that have been ...
Date: Reviewed in the United States on December 2, 2015
Review: I keep ordering this book over and over again because it's one of the best I've found to give to teens that have been sexually abused. This book is social worker approved!

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